Summer Vacation–Go Away!

Go away, everybody, it’s summer! Why were there 18 hits on this site last Thursday? Eighteen people who just love school way too much…

Actually, now that you’re here, check out this message I sent out yesterday to every student whose email address I had in my address book:

I greet you. It’s Matt.

You are receiving this message either because: a) you are a student who sent me email this year and thus have left yourself vulnerable to electronic communications from your English teacher (i.e. the enemy) during your summer vacation, or, b) you are Brandon Arnold.

Here’s a homework assignment for those of you who like to both rock AND to roll. Everyone else, please go away now.

I don’t know if I was the only one who spent the past week or two wondering why there were no good shows on the calendar for the summer months here in SLC. Well, it turns out the city has someone who actually likes good music running the twilight concert series this year, and some really good bands are coming and playing–get this–for free.

That’s right. These shows are free, and kid-approved (all ages). You can check out the website with all the info here, but here’s the important stuff:

Concerts start at 7pm, but you can save places starting at 1:30. If you are a good-for-nothing kid, or self-“employed” for the summer (like me), you should get there early to save places for the harder-working among us (i.e., my wife). I’ll probably come early and bring my collected works of Walt Whitman and Emily Dickinson because that’s the way I roll, yo.

Here are the dates I, your dedicated teacher, think you should be interested in:

July 19: Yo La Tengo | The Fiery Furnaces

July 26: moe. | Dr. Dogg (I don’t know anything about moe.–looks like a crappy jam band–but quite a few of you really liked the Dr. Dogg songs I played in class last semester)

August 2: Peter Bjorn and John | Apostle of Hustle

August 23: Calexico | The French Kicks

My friends, this is well over $100 worth of free shows that would normally be happening in gross bars full of perverted middle-aged jerks–bars you wouldn’t be allowed into with the fake ID’s from the state of “Utha” your illiterate step-cousin Delmer made anyway…so CARPE DIEM, suckaz. We should get a big East Hollywood blanket or something to show our school spirit. Go Screamin’ Flamingos!



Now that I think of it, I have a few other cultural events, movies, and books I’d like to send your way. Maybe I’ll email everyone on the list every couple of weeks with ideas about how to get your real education done this summer while you don’t have the hassle of school in your way.

If you didn’t get the email above, and want to be on what I will now call my Summer Miseducation Information Clearinghouse list, comment on this post or send me an email:

Now, shoo! Go learn some life lessons or some crap like that.



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